Egghead

I’m not up on the egg terminology if you know what I mean. The only one I know is “scrambled”. When we go to a diner, this is a typical conversation:

Waitress: How would you like your eggs?

Me: Oh god.

Waitress: You know… sunny side up, fried, runny, scrambled, daisy side down with a pig’s blanket….

Me: Uh… you know how the egg white part can be solidified and the egg yolk part is still round and sits in the middle? Can I have it like that?

Waitress: Do you want it runny?

Me: What?

Steve: You know, the yellow stuff, they break the yolk.

Me: No don’t break the yolk, but don’t have it all slimey in the center please.

*Waitress leaves*

Steve (reacting like he did when I asked for a donut menu at a Dunkin Donuts drive thru): Fried egg.

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